How could I have NOT understood that my 2nd personal pivotal need is Autonomy? It seems so obvious now. 3 years in the MKE I have contemplated this. First convinced it was Legacy, then True Health. But as my dear friend and mentor, Mark J, often points out – when you identify your two most critical needs and get them met, the others tend to fall into place automatically (or effortlessly). I will definitely have more thoughts to share about Autonomy this summer…..as well as on my gratitude-immersed life. But for now, I wanted to share a blog I ran across from www.creative-personal-growth.com. It sheds some light on what happens to us from the time we’re children that ends up stripping us of our Autonomy. And of course, I find myself sadly reflecting on how I’ve done the same to my own 3 children without awareness. They’re all adults now….struggling through their 20’s and 30’s trying to discover their true selves. It’s my deep desire that they will find each eventually find their bliss. But alas, it’s neither my job nor my right to exert any influence on their thinking. To do so would rob them of their own self-discovery! But as I enter my 60’s maybe it’s not too late to inspire them. It’s taken me a long time to find and get acquainted with MY true self. This is my season of adventure, discovery and deep character-building. I am obsessed with my new PPNs, creating strategies to interrupt old habits and replace with new. I’m practicing delayed gratification, living in the NOW and taking action every day toward achievement of my goals. I will take possession of my personal Autonomy and say good-bye to co-dependency….it no longer serves me. I will take possession of my creative power and manifest Liberty for the first time in my adult life….because I deserve it. And I am on the path to authentic self-reliance. It feels good, even though the path is rough and I stumble often. I am grateful.
Thank you, MJ, for walking the path before me. And for helping me see….without influence….that there’s a beautiful light inside beckoning me forward.
From “Self Knowledge For Creative Personal Growth”:
Personal Autonomy is
to Personal Growth
What is Personal Autonomy?
Personal autonomy is our right to be self determining, our right to choose how we live our lives. It is I think of particular importance when people are involved in any kind of therapeutic situation.
As humans we have a desire for personal autonomy. We have a desire to be the person who chooses how we live our lives. We have a desire not to be controlled by others. As young children when we are learning about the world we may be happy to follow what those we trust tell us, but, as we all know as we approach adolescence we fight with fierce determination for our right to change this situation and make our own choices, independent of those whom we have been accustomed to following. If we are not able to move into a position where we are self determining, if we feel under the control of another then we find ourselves in a very difficult situation. To not act in accordance with what feels right to oneself results in severe mental confusion because we are not able to be who we are. Indeed this problem begins far earlier than adolescence. If as babies and young children our basic needs are not looked after, or if we are expected to act in ways which are against our basic nature, then damage will have been done in our psyche.
The reality is that it is more or less impossible in our world as it is now for someone to grow up being a truly autonomous person. If we did we would probably be what is considered enlightened. Most of us early on lose contact with who we are. We then develop our ego, which we believe is who we are. People acting only from this stance will be “living in their heads” and will not be able to feel empathy for others. However, thankfully, very few people are so hurt that they lose contact with their inner resources completely. The less good part of this is that most of us will grow up with some areas of disturbance. We will notice that sometimes we do not act as we would like to act and we do not feel as we would like to feel. Everyone deals with this in different ways. Some people take to criminal activity and end up in jails. Others will “go loopy” and end up in a mental hospital. Some get interested in Politics. Others become very good at their jobs. Still others will make sure they have the “best kept” family in the neighbourhood. Whatever avenue people take they are either acting out their problems or distracting themselves from the feeling of unease.
However there is one other avenue that people may choose to go down. They may look for a way to sort out the problems so that they can gain access to their own genuineness and hence their personal autonomy. This is not the sign of a weak person, it is the sign of a honest person and this is where personal growth comes in.
Personal growth is all about and should be all about helping a person to be in touch with their own authenticity and hence their personal autonomy, and sadly much of supposed help does not do this. In a healthy world people who ended up in a psychiatric hospital or prison would also be given this help because this is the very thing that people need if they are to work constructively.
The problem with going for help which will respect one’s autonomy comes about because the person who is “giving” the help frequently does not have very much autonomy themselves. The are frequently ‘doing’ the help rather than genuinely “giving” in any way. They are so often more in a situation of controlling rather than empowering.
Read the rest of this article here: www.creative-personal-growth.com
It’s KINDNESS WEEK!! This is by far one of my favorite weeks in the Master Key Experience. I wanted to share this great post from my friend, partner and MKMMA member, Kajean Secord-Bennett. Kajean is a talented, courageous, amazing woman and mother. I have SO loved following her posts throughout the course and it’s been an honor to witness her journey. She was inspired to write two posts this week…. Enjoy!
You are lucky to get a double dose this week…
I have been so inspired since I have started taking this course. I am starting to feel empowered and confident like I did before my world was taken over by mini humans. I am focused and determined on coming to Kauai and completing a circle in my journey. This is no easy feat for a family of five on a single income. So to help fund the expenses and manifest this as a reality….
Read the rest of Kajean’s post here: https://goo.gl/nWhSFl
I love the new me emerging. I have a sense of awe when people see the new me emerging. I love the symbol idea it is a tremendous help when getting through the day positive. Love the gratitude cards as I see the new positive me emerge. I compare this process to metamorphosis.
Interestingly as I am changing I see people who have a negative outlook I would love to see as many people take this class. I love it and I am becoming more self confident with the passing days my excitement level is very high with all the new tools helping to cement the new me and letting go of the old me.
Through MKMMA we have ventured into the “World Within” and it’s impact on the “World Without”. We are coming into an understanding of the operation of the 2 facets of our mind – the conscious and the subconscious – and learning to apply this knowledge in our lives to facilitate a “complete personal make-over”, if you will. The profound discovery that the subconscious mind literally makes ALL the decisions is the foundation of this course. Our daily actions dictate the conditions and results we experience….and these have been literally pre-determined without our knowledge by our old “blueprint”, created by our subconscious after years and years of outside influences. To sum it up: our thoughts, charged with whatever feelings we attach to them, determine our beliefs. Our beliefs, in turn, dictate the actions we take, which necessarily then determine the results or conditions we experience in our lives. So the thoughts we dwell on every day and how intensely we feel about them – quite literally mold and shape the landscape of our lives.
Of the Seven Laws of the Mind, 6 ultimately cultivate the proper mental landscape for us to apply The Law of Growth:
“What we think about grows, what we forget atrophies”
It’s also key to state the Law of Subconscious Activity here – as I comment on Debt and Denial:
“As soon as the subconscious accepts the idea it becomes a demand and it works constantly, 24/7, to manifest demand – accessing a reservoir of infinite resources”.
So let’s talk about debt. How many people in this world, would you guess, stay awake at night worrying about their bills, loans, mortgages, kids college costs, daycare costs, car repairs, credit scores, etc? How about the relentless harassment that people get via phone calls, mail and even door knocks from creditors? Do you think this causes mental pre-occupation? Negative self-talk? Worthlessness? FEAR? Divorce? Worse? It’s no wonder that the hot topic on peoples’ goal statements or new years resolutions have to do with “getting out of debt”. Some work exhaustively and think obsessively about “getting out of debt”. Its on their mind 24/7.
NEWS FLASH!!! The subconscious mind can’t differentiate between whether you like debt or hate debt. All it hears is DEBT! It accepts it as a DEMAND because we’re so pre-occupied with it. So it goes to work constantly, 24/7, to manifest….. guess what? MORE DEBT! What we think about grows!!!
But….what we forget atrophies.
I never thought of the word denial as something positive. My mind typically goes to an association such as a person being unwilling to face their issues, such as with addiction. But the preface to this week’s Master Key lesson really gave me an epiphany. Yes, I have learned through writing my own DMP that we should not use negative concepts and language such as “debt” in our goals. We can substitute more positive phrases like “paid in full”, for instance. But I feel compelled to “shout from the roof” that everyone has the power to change this mess. By learning and practicing the art/science of thought control, we have the ability to intentionally DENY ourselves thoughts about debt and financial worries and fears. And gradually, over time, it will disappear. To quote Haanel:
“….This does not mean that some thought is creative, but that all thought is creative. This same principle can be brought into operation in a negative way, through the process of denial.
It follows that if you deny unsatisfactory conditions, you are withdrawing the creative power of your thought from these conditions. You are cutting them away at the root. You are sapping their vitality.
Remember that the law of growth necessarily governs every manifestation in the objective, so that a denial of unsatisfactory conditions will not bring about instant change. A plant will remain visible for some time after its roots have been cut, but it will gradually fade away and eventually disappear, so the withdrawal of your thought from the contemplation of unsatisfactory conditions will gradually, but surely, terminate these conditions.
You will see that this is an exactly opposite course from the one which we would naturally be inclined to adopt.
It will therefore have an exactly opposite effect to the one usually secured. Most persons concentrate intently upon unsatisfactory conditions, thereby giving the condition that measure of energy and vitality which is necessary in order to supply a vigorous growth”
Powerful, wouldn’t you agree?
Who would ever have thought something so simple and plain could have such a profound effect?
Over the past 2 weeks MKMMA members have been creating 2 unique decks of flash cards consisting mostly of short, descriptive phrases representing accomplishments in their lives. To begin the process they created 30-50 cards, each stating something they’ve done, experienced, completed or achieved. These things may be as profound as saving a life or purchasing a house or traveling the world…..to something typically taken for granted such as brushing your teeth twice a day or driving the kids home from school. They continue to add accomplishments to their decks, mix in additional cards containing some of their favorite MKMMA affirmations and best of all – they have now begun adding 3 gratitudes to their decks every day. The exercise is to flash through some of all of the cards several times per day, shuffling the decks each time to mix up the order and keep the subconscious on it’s toes.
As members execute this exercise daily on faith – a brilliant progression is underway. And the payoff will be big.
Regardless of whether you are a fellow MKMMA member or not – I challenge you to make these 2 decks of cards yourself and repeat this exercise daily. It will simply blow your mind. We’ve been programmed to hyper-focus on those few things we believe we’ve done wrong instead of the huge number of wonderful things we do right. We downplay our accomplishments, let the world know about our screw-ups, even create humor around them. But when you start flashing through dozens of simple cards daily that remind you of all the wonderful things you’ve done, of everything you’re grateful for and also positive, meaningful affirmations – you begin to understand your greatness. You realize you’ve done A LOT of really good stuff in your life and you continue to do more everyday. It becomes easy to acknowledge your accomplishments instead of focus on your shortcomings. I wonder why on earth nobody did this simple exercise with us as school children.
Add to this a well-written DMP (in all it’s variations), utilizing the 7 Laws of the Mind and the Mental Diet, Emerson’s Law (Give More, Get More), the Master Key System, the principles laid out in the 10 Scrolls in The Greatest Salesman book….plus forging authentic mastermind alliances with others…..
We begin to observe our “old blueprint” beginning to crumble.
“Goodbye….I don’t need you anymore.”
Here are some of my cards:
Wife to Rick
Donated lots of clothes & other items
Lived in Monterey, CA
I am a magnet for people who desire change
Got a chemistry degree
Grateful for Jacki B
Red Cross safety & health instructor (taught CPR)
Taught group fitness classes
Lived in ND
Local Coordinator for MN
Grateful for all the gifts I received yesterday
I am whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious and happy
Achieved many local challenges
Watched 2 baseball games in Greenville
Grateful for MMA with Mark J
Grateful for Lydia M
Dream Team 2006
Ski’d in Austria
Helped Zach navigate college financial aid
Grateful for Josh Luce
Grateful for amazing dinner on Christmas Eve with Phil & Alice
Lived in Germany
Read The Hobbit & Lord of the Rings Trilogy
Went on cruise w/ family & neighbors in 2004
Grateful for Sarah
Traveled to SC many times to stay with Mom & Dad in final years
Drove a grain truck in ND
Coached lots of people to better health
Grateful for my cozy car to do my sits
Went to Kauai with Rick in 2016
Landed a plane on parallel runways at MSP
Grandma to Remy
Saw Bruce Springsteen several times in concert
Do it now!
Started a business
Local speaker in Chicago
Grateful for heat on cold winter days
Learned to play tennis
I always keep my promises
Attended my kids sports events and concerts
I can be what I will to be
Good sense of humor
Loving human to Callie, Cooper, Lily, Scooter, Abbey, Remy, Penny, Ruger
Completed half marathon in 2013
Grateful I work from home
Grateful Callie joined our family today
Went to Disney World with family twice
Helped Sarah start her catering business
Led hazmat team at SurModics
Grateful for Catherine
Went back to get Cooper
Worked at SurModics for 11 yrs
Grateful for every day I have with Cooper
Lived & ski’d in Utah
Mom to Sarah
Grateful for Mark J
Good server in my restaurant jobs
Replaced my corporate salary with MA income so I could work from home
Grateful for Colleen
Went to Grand Canyon
Visited, lived and trained in AZ
Ask and you shall receive
Grateful I met Ron & Sue
Mother to Catherine
Cheerleader in Jr High
Visited Colorado numerous times
Solo’s in an airplane
Bought a Mazda 6
Grateful for Zachary
Learned to play classical piano
Sister to Dee & George
Lived in England
Raised our kids in Glen Lake
Worked at Henkel for 7 yrs
Grateful I was with Dad in his final days
Bought Ford Edge
New mom to Callie
Skipped 1st grade
Trained with Sam for 2 years
Watched MN Twins win world series in 1987
Grateful for Rick
MA Professional Coordinator
Learned to fly with dad
Learned to crochet
Lost 48 lbs & 10% body fat
Finished high school early
Saw Prince in concert
Mother to Zach
Traveled to 26 states
Grateful for the gifts I was blessed to give to others on Thursday
Grateful for Edie
Saw several shows at Guthrie theater
Grateful for Steve Heil
Learned to speak ‘German
Bought home in NE Minneapolis
Lived in Hawaii
Daughter to George & Alma
Made a great dinner on Thanksgiving
Gave a rose to Prince in Blockbuster
Grateful for Jeff Carter
The list goes on…..and the decks keep growing!
The very first audio book I ever listened to after I began my network marketing business was “The Science of Personal Achievement” by Napoleon Hill. I loved the book and it was especially endearing to me because it was narrated by the author. There was just something about hearing Mr Hill’s own voice tell his story that really drew me in – the conviction, the inflections in his voice and his “old school” style of reading.
What began in this course as a requirement to read certain important literary works every day – exactly as prescribed (as part of a carefully planned-out progression for mental development) has now turned into a pleasure and almost an obsession for me. We are given access to one chapter at a time from Charles Haanel’s Master Key System, which we are to read daily for a full week. In addition, we have developed the habit of reading each Scroll in Og Mandino’s book “The Greatest Salesman in the World” 3 times/day for an entire month before moving on to the next Scroll. Each Scroll contains a principle which is hugely impactful when we apply it in our daily lives (as Haanel writes, “knowledge does not apply itself; we as individuals must make the application”). To supplement, we have been provided other highly relevant essays from Napoleon Hill, Ralph Waldo Emmerson & Emmet Fox to help us make connections between these writings and the daily exercises we execute toward our goal of mastering our thoughts and tapping into the unlimited power we hold within.
Before this course, I had never read anything by Charles Haanel or Og Mandino. I felt compelled to look up Haanel and read his biography, which I found fascinating (I highly recommend you do the same). In a recent conversation with a friend, we were talking about Og Mandino and how we’re using The Greatest Salesman book in MKMMA. He said he’d read it before, as well as several of Og’s other books, including “The Greatest Secret in the World” (his favorite). After sharing some great thoughts and insight, my friend texted me the message: “Have you heard Og Mandino’s story?”. When I said no – he replied, “spend 12 minutes and listen to it here”:
I wanted to share it with my fellow MKMMA buddies – just in case you haven’t had the pleasure. If you scroll down the page and click on the audio you can hear this beloved man tell his own story – his own voice. And below that are 3 great stories about Og told by his wife, Bette – including one entitled “The Night the Ten Scrolls Were Written”. Enjoy!
I love Week 11 in the MKMMA course. There is a huge payoff for members who have been doing the work – a moment of extraordinary enlightenment and sudden understanding. Mark and Davene reveal on the webcast that over the past 10 weeks – as members dug deep to identify and clearly define their definite major purpose and faithfully executed a progression of tasks, mental exercises, studies, readings, writings, visualizations – they were being “set up” for success by a masterful progression in the course curriculum! In his famous life work described in the book, “Think and Grow Rich”, Napoleon Hill interviewed 504 of the world’s most successful people to determine what key qualities or characteristics they all possessed in common. He revealed 13 key principles. And all of these principles were designed to develop the HABIT of PERSISTENCE. Contrary to popular belief, persistence is a habit -not a characteristic which some people possess and others do not.
So what’s the payoff? Working in collaboration, Hill and W Clement Stone discovered that there are 4 necessary steps in all walks of life to assure the development of persistence – 4 steps by which one can control their own economic destiny….steps which lead to freedom and independence of thought. These 4 steps are essentially the “mini-habits” that MKMMA members have been developing over the past 10 weeks of this course, namely:
1. A definite purpose, backed by a burning for it’s fulfillment (DMPs and PPN’s)
2. A definite plan, expressed in continuous action (the written plan of action, focusing on World Within and traction points to move their business or other smart goals forward)
3. A mind closed tightly against negative or discouraging influences, including negative suggestions of relatives, friends and acquaintances (the Mental Diet)
4. Friendly (Mastermind) alliance with one or more persons who will encourage one to follow through with both plan and purpose (the ultimate MMA with oneself (Gal/Guy in the Glass) – as well as with at least one other partner and the MKMMA members as a group in the members area.
One key thing that also hit me on the webcast was the undeniable fact that persistence is NOT equivalent to “not quitting”. People have been tricked into believing that just “hanging in there” will bring them success. But nothing could be further from the truth – not quitting is not the same as winning! If we have taken the 4 steps above, remain vigilant to the exercises and understand that everything we have done so far and continue to do in this course will assure that we “form this habit (persistence) and become it’s slave” – WE WIN.
I love this quote by Calvin Coolidge – the last line is completed in blue:
Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan “Press On” has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.”
My amazing father, George Hammond, passed away 3 years ago this month. He was an American hero and he was my hero. He was loved and admired by everyone who ever knew him, worked with him, served with him, loved him. He was one of the most enlightened people I have ever known and I have always strived to be more like him – not just because he was my dad, but because he was one of the most amazing human beings on earth. He left a huge impact on so many. As I have matriculated though the Master Key course as both a member and a guide, working the exercises, practicing the mental diet and immersing myself in this study, I have identified all the virtues I so loved in George Hammond. If I didn’t know better, I’d think my dad had taken this course 60 years ago – or at least spent his life studying Emerson, Haanel, Wattles, James Allen and the like (though I never saw him read as a habit). But he was a man of refined character and incredible wisdom who passionately lived a principle-based life. As I continue into the unknown and persist toward the fulfillment of my greater purpose – I am reminded of something he said to me over and over….at last, fully understanding it’s significance. “Press On, Honey”.
A moment of reflection. Many changes since then, some profound, some not. Some things feel like growth….others feel like a step back or way too slow-going. But I am reminded of Og in the 1st scroll: “Within my allotted time I must practice the art of patience, for nature never acts in haste”.
Behind on my blog….
The world without has been a complex place the past few weeks and months….. interwoven with family connection, chaos, conflict and a swirl of emotions as 2 parents, 3 adult children, a couple of spouses and 3 dogs have come together in transition to launch a new family catering business. And for the time being – all living under one roof again, I might add. My kids are becoming re-acquainted with each other as adults, as friends, as siblings, as business owners. They’ve moved away, lived on their own, moved back, given up privacy – they’re learning to share, argue, resolve conflict, work together, communicate and take turns holding each other up as one melt-down after another occurs during this insanely busy season for any successful caterer. In a nutshell …..my home environment has been a pressure cooker for way too many reasons to list here. And where am I in all of this?
You guessed it….right square in the middle.
I had a fight with my husband last night that was stupid…..full of misunderstanding, reactivity. My brain manufactured a hefty dose of old peptides, which rushed in to feed my craving cells their fix. I went to bed feeling consumed…..used up….exhausted and totally OVER the whole thing.
In the wee hours of the morning, still dark in my bedroom, my chef husband walked out in silence to begin his 14 hr day. And then – during his car ride to work – we laid the foundation for a conversation to resume tomorrow. A day for both of us to work, think, process and begin resolution of the complex set of issues that define our household right now.
I tried to go back to sleep in our room, but my mind was racing. This is not commonplace for me anymore – not since I’ve been studying and applying the principles I’ve learned through the Master Key Experience. So I sought out the Silence.
I sat in the dark, closed my eyes and attempted to relax and empty my thoughts. Typically this process is pretty easy for me. But not today. As I relaxed my body my mind felt like it was caught up in the eye of a major storm. Thoughts swirling, it was so noisy in my head, and I struggled every time I tried to calm it. All I wanted in that moment was to open the channel, establish connection and find serenity. I just wanted to sit and feel. Desperate for calmness that wasn’t coming – my thoughts suddenly locked on to my wise, loving, calm, father and nurturing, loving mother…..both of whom lost recently and miss dearly. And suddenly there I was…. with my secret council on my mountain top in my comfy chair. A flood of emotion came over me and the tears flowed……and then immediate calm.
No huge revelations in the sit today….just the connection I sought and solitude for about an hour.
And then my beautiful little puppy Callie woke me up and filled my heart with joy as she came out of her cosy bed and made me feel like puppies do – like you’re the most special and awesome person that exists in their world. We just played while everyone else slept – for about an hour.
And now I feel like “I’m back”
The Love Scroll. “I greet this day with love in my heart”
This is one of Og’s 10 scrolls that I revisit regularly, even after doing the official 90 reads prescribed for the Master Key course. I often fall to sleep listening to an audio recording of it….my favorite readers being either my own voice or that of the precious and inspiring author, Og Mandino. Think about it. If you feed your mind the powerful message conveyed in these few pages – and combine it with the intentional, daily practice of reading the Law of Giving out loud, refraining from giving opinions and disallowing negative thoughts from taking hold….there is no way your path in life could NOT shift towards harmony, happiness, success and a deeply rooted appreciation for all that exists in this world.
Haanel says in Lesson 9, Part 2:
“The three things which all mankind desires and which are necessary for his highest expression and complete development are Health, Wealth and Love.”
and in Part 16:
“If you require love try to realize that the only way to get love is by giving it, that the more you give the more you will get, and the only way in which you can give it, is to fill yourself with it, until you become a magnet.”
BAM! Give more love, get more love…..so simple, so very simple. As we re-program our thinking, as we train and practice living in the dynamic flow of Giving and Receiving…..and continue to remind ourselves to “love all manners of men, for each has qualities to be admired even though they be hidden” and hone our skills of being a non-judgmental observer….we become focused on love and gratitude…
Law of Growth takes over! To “sum it up”:
The Love Scroll
+ Master Key Lesson 9
+ Law of Giving
+ Emerson’s Essay on Compensation
+ Fox’s Mental Diet
+ ME practicing the art of keeping my damn opinions to myself
+ A little daily humor since I’m not perfect at any of these things yet
= MORE: HARMONY……HAPPINESS…..PATIENCE….CHARACTER….SERENITY….LOVE
The Master Key Experience is nothing short of AMAZING and the creators of this course are BRILLIANT. Thank you Mark, Davene, Trish, Derek and the rest of the staff…..for the incredible tools, the brilliantly thought-out sequences, the beautiful timing of it all. For it is a true gift that you have skillfully designed…. and then humbly allowed US to give it to ourselves. The ability to live a life of never-ending self-discovery, regardless of when we begin.
Og reading Scroll II is below – Enjoy!