People learn by doing. And for those of us who went “all in” this week, we’re pouring ourselves into active daily exercise that’s beginning to wear new grooves into our subconscious mind. We know this….we already feel change and every day our faith grows that the new habits being formed are taking us toward our true purpose. My goodness, if you’re like me….just figuring out what that purpose is and working on articulating it has been a monumental challenge in it’s own right! But as I’ve come to understand the brilliant purpose, function and interaction of our conscious and subconscious minds – it really hit me how critically important it is to become The Observer. Davene has said it over and over. At first I didn’t quite understand what she meant, but this week it really hit home. Why? Because those moments of feeling overwhelmed really started to surface for me (daily, actually). In the moment it’s been really empowering to take pause, notice and acknowledge where it’s coming from – and then override it by taking action. In our past we’ve often been told to “step back and think” before acting or reacting to something. Perhaps we were trying to change our behavior or response to someone or something in particular. I think back on many confrontational interactions with my daughter when she was a teenager, for example. As I allowed my “hot buttons” to be pushed time and time again I was aware of feeling totally alien in my own skin at the time. No matter how many times I told myself that “next time” I wouldn’t raise my voice or get defensive – that I would take a breath, walk away and THINK before I reacted…..I still found myself in the same behavioral cycle in the heat of the moment every time. I didn’t know where it all came from, what I could do about it or why I didn’t succeed even though I so badly wanted to be different. The way I acted in those conflicts was not the real “I”. The good news is, we’ve both grown immensely since those years (she’s now 28) and our relationship is close and connecting thanks to love, maturity, personal growth (on both of our parts) and time. But oh how I wish I knew then what I know now! That old blueprint, charged with emotion, creating certain beliefs, driving my reactions, dictating my results…..over and over, same cycle. Those powerful memories resurfaced this week because now I have some insight about what that was all about – and upon reflection, it occurred to me how different it may have been in those stormy months and years. I’m not one to look back – neither is my daughter. She and I have agreed that we have no regrets for any of our past struggles, for they have brought us to where we are today. Gratitude, enlightenment, confidence and contentment grows within me today. The future is very bright!
I’m watching you, Old Blueprint….you’re on your way out, dude!! 🙂